Tuesday, May 5, 2009

My quarter-life crisis

You never know what's going on behind the curtain. From the audience it seems like everyone has it going on. Everyone is making more money than you, creating more, has more friends, moving up in the world, happier, and just generally making a real contribution. But honestly, we're all just fumbling around in the dark wondering how everyone else is making it.

No one talks about this quarter-life crisis thing. No one cares about the twenty something population. I feel like being a twenty something is like walking a tight rope from childhood to adulthood, and you never know when you're going to fall flat on your stomach and have the wind knocked out of you.

I'm 26, but just now beginning to realize that this is what I'm going through. Growing through. I thought it was just me being a huge failure, but apparently it's quite common. That's good to know. But when does it end? When do I feel like I've finally "made it"?

The job search is awful. I'm trying to decide whether I need to stay in my hometown and continue to look for a so-so job in which to pay bills with and save money or if I should move on to the big city and continue my search there. I could get to the city and have the same bout of bad luck, but I don't see that I have anything to lose. I like having the comfort of my friends and family though. This is what it all comes down to. Getting out of my comfort zone. Taking a bit of a risk. Either way, I will probably end up losing money.

Decisions, decisions.


carey said...

the quarter-life crisis can really suck, but it can also be a wonderful opportunity to take action and transform yourself. i went thru mine about five years ago and it was absolutely miserable at the time, but i came out of it having made a lot of positive changes in my life--including a new vocation, which i continue to fall in love with every day. good luck to you.

LindaTheShootress said...

this post is the best description of the painful situation i myself am stuck in right now. being told once more, reading black on white, that behind the oh so golden curtain of everyone around you, there are doubts and darknesses and insecurities too. and as ridiculous as it may be, that makes it easier sometimes.

mermaid musings said...

I somehow "lost" you and i am catching up with you right now, sweetie, knowing me ten years ago i would have said go to the city in an adventure but now in my forties, i will say stay with your family and friends BUT do what your heart tells you and i am here thinking of you and apologizing for being away from you.
hugs lots of big soul hugs!